I've talked before about my views on changing my name (summary: I don't like my last name or his, and I'm going with his because it's easier even though I'm not too happy about it), but there is a part of the name issue that is much more problematic for me than changing my name, and that is gaining the title "Mrs."
Full disclosure: I'm still a little meh about getting married so young. Though to be honest, my job makes me feel a lot older. I may be getting married at 23, but at least I don't have a kid (Er, if any work peoples are reading this, no offense, I'm just so not ready for that)!
But I digress. To me, "Mrs." = "old," and I have enough trouble with giving up feeling young as it is, and adding such an old-sounding title is just, bleh.
But that's not the worst of the problem for me. My inner feminist has a problem with the word "Mrs." I always hated that "Mrs." was just an extension of "Mr." I mean, there is no other reason to abbreviate "missus" with an "r" in it. And when I think of "Mrs.," I get flash-backs to fifties housewives instead of warm, fuzzy feelings about being Daniel's wife.
Which brings up another word I have a problem with: "wife." Now, I have no problem with the word "husband." That doesn't evoke any negative feelings for me and brings only a few uncomfortable ones. "Wife" on the other hand makes me cringe whenever I hear it. "Wife" brings on even more fifties flash-backs than "Mrs."
I know it's all in my head. I know I will never be the kind of wife that the word makes me envision. And I know Daniel is the last person who would want me to be that kind of wife.
Nonetheless, the association continues.
So the question remains: what do I do about it? I mean, it's not like people aren't going to call me Mrs. F--, and I probably shouldn't cringe every time Daniel calls me his wife.
Well, I'm probably going to go by "Ms." at first even though I used to think that was a pointless addition to the many titles for women (btw, anyone else bugged by the fact that there are 3 titles for women when men only have 1? Doesn't seem fair to me). People will still call me Mrs. F--, but that's OK. People have called Daniel Mr. My Last Name, so it's only fair.
And "wife?" Well, that one's a bit trickier. The only solution I have is to get over it. It will probably take a while, but I'm hoping that once I get used to the word, it will be a happy one instead of suffocating.
Thoughts? Agreement? Disagreement? How do you feel about being a "Mrs." or a "wife?"